he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
