I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize