haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
