Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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