sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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