Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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