I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
