I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
If I die, sorry about rent.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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