I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Someone signed my nipple.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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