I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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