Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize