I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
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