butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
