No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize
