so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize