at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
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