Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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