If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
