No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
