Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
