Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting

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(314): View more from Missouri

He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast

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(956): View more from Texas

Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(407): View more from Florida

Your cock is gonna weep like a baby

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(845): View more from New York

I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings

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(509): View more from Washington

My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand

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(727): View more from Florida

If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.

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(716): View more from New York

ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.

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