so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I think a kid would responsible me up
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
