i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
