her vagine was all disorganized.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
