we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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