oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize