Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
