We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Be still, my beating vagina.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Randomize