I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
