y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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