why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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