Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
