Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
