I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
