He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
