No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
