She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
