Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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