lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize