At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize
