I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I think I sprained my soul last night
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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