so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
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there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
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Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.