hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
