Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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