i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
