I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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