you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize