Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
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He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
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Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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