you turned your livingroom into a bong?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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