is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
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