Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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